Politics of marriage: Exploring the intersection of love, violence and power in When I Hit You by Meena Kandasamy

Abstract

Violence against women cuts across cultures and is evident in the public and private spheres. In most patriarchal societies, such abuse is legitimized within marriage. Meena Kandasamy's “When I Hit You: Or A Portrait of the Writer as a Young Wife” is a scathing critique of marriage as an institution that often combines love with power and violence and reveals subtle, but devastating forms of abuse women suffer. This study examines the heroine's experiences of emotional, psychological, and sexual torture at the hands of a masochistic husband; however, her journey into resistance and freedom is interwoven with it. The Study uses the feminist and postcolonial theoretical paradigm to question how colonial and patriarchal legacies in society perpetuate gender oppression. The study’s qualitative analysis of the text foregrounds marriage as a contested site, where love and loyalty often camouflage control and domination. It delves into why women like the protagonist stay in abusive relationships and survival strategies. Findings underscore the systemic nature of intimate partner violence, socio-cultural factors that bind women to abusive relationships, and the survival as well as defiance strategies they adopt. The study advances feminist and postcolonial discourse through the amplification of the voice of the protagonist; it challenges the normalization of violence in marital spaces and the need to re-imagine love and agency within oppressive patriarchal contexts.